Wednesday, February 11, 2009

One little something...

I'm a lover of words. Often when faced with the reality of a moment, I find that words fail me. I need more than a moment to channel the whirling thoughts into meaningful conversation...lol. Which is why I love writing. When I'm out of the immediacy of a moment, words don't fail. I can sit here and stare at the Microsoft document for an hour with only one sentence typed...and given time, I can create.
I have such a strong desire to create. I have words running through my mind...small fragments of "somethings" that long to be crafted into significance and worthy of consideration. I want to write a song...a poem...a book...

I enjoy solid quotes. One of my favorites, possibly because of its simplicity and straightforwardness, is "Start by starting". (Glenn Close...smart, eh?)
So one night I went out to the reservoir. I thought I'd be inspired by the water...the sunset. That place usually inspires me. I was going to "start by starting". I bought a new notebook. I bought new pens. (in purple, even...a color that, in my world, is associated with epiphanies ;)
I heard the wind...and I heard the thoughts in my mind. Still formless. They weren't lyrics, or lines of a poem, or sentences for a book...they were just rolling pieces.

"I'm finding I need very little persuasion to think of you...so entwined you are in my mind. Even so small a thing as a breath is filled with your scent.
There is no need for a token, lovely as they are.
Because the simple is filled with you, any other tangible memory overwhelms my senses."

My thoughts were racing, but the sun went quickly. I lost the light...
And all of the images and words in my mind went with it.
I found that my hands weren't quite as proficient with a pen as they were a keyboard, and my thoughts outran them.
All I could think as the sun set on my creativity was that I really needed a drink of water and a bathroom. Hm.

I'm not going to give up, though.
I can't let go of the desire.
I need to want something attainable for a while.